I have fancied women, I do fancy women, I also fancy men and do fancy men.

It's a source of amazement to some, amusement to others and some people think it's a pose. Strange but true, I've fancied men and women for as long as I've fancied, well - either of them. This is where the problem first starts for me. In making a distinction between the TWO sexes, it defines sexuality as being either single or double, and if you're double you must be weird, whereas in reality, for me, well - frankly I have no idea what it's like to be "straight" so I can't answer for them, but…

I hate that word: "bi-sexual". Two sexes. No, totally - not the point, wrong, wrong, wrong. Well, look - for me, I fancy women in the fantasy "Oooh blimey, she's a bit of alright" type way if I look at, say, that Linda Hamilton cliché, where she's siting at the broken down bench in the desert, wearing sun glasses and digging a knife in the table. I can remember seeing that film in a cinema (T2 btw, in caae you don't know) and genuinely sitting agape, with my then boyfriend, amused, sitting next to me refusing to accept she looked fantastic. I can remember sitting in GLR, looking after a programme, a few people in the room, looking up and seeing a row of flexing women swimmers on the TV monitor in front of us. Without having time to think, I let out a gasp of appreciation. Well, that was that. In "real life" I tend to fancy larger, friendly looking women. Big, beautiful, warm faced, round bodies… absolutely no idea why but perhaps, oh… I really genuinely have no idea why to be honest.

So the way I have a tendency to describe how I feel is "non-gender aligned", which sounds obnoxious but the point is I tend to fancy people. Individuals. Don't really care which sex they are in the first instance, I'll end up fancying an amazing array of friends/acquaintances/you name it. In fact, I have a tendency to fancy straight friends, which is quite sad. That's happened to me almost endlessly. Particularly in London, where I don't feel too comfortable going out of the "scene", because the gay scene seems to me to be as straight as the, er, "straight" scene. If you're honest and you say "I don't care what sex you are as long as you're nice" people look at you as if you're some sort of wierdo. Not exactly very welcome.

You know another thing that annoys me? There are no really decent bi-sexual icons that people who just fancy people can latch on to. Wilde was married, he had kids, he obviously had an erection on at least two occasions with his wife, but he's a gay icon. Why do you have to "become" gay? Why did Julie Burchill have to "try" Lesbianism? Is it impossible for people to conceive of a notion of being able to have a sexual relationship with a man OR a woman - and it doesn't actually matter?